3 AM Repositioning of Jack ❤️

It's 3 AM.  Im currently still awake and I just got done repositioning Jack for probably the 7th time tonight.  Yes, I have all of my health "stuff" but right now, obviously my main concern is Jack.  I mean, as much pain as I watch him in, I have sat here and thought tonight, am I wrong to be so sad for him as this is nothing compared to what so many other kids face daily like cancer, or quadriplegia?  Yes, he is in a ton of pain, but his can be fixed and I can comfort him.  There are so many other parents who can't "fix" their children.  It just makes me sad.  

Then I go on to think: ok, I'm now off of work until he is able to have surgery so I can take care of him, because of obviously nights like this.  And, all during the day the same thing happens.  How the heck am I going to afford all of anything?  This poor kid, he feels so bad for needing help, Everytime he asks me for help, he apologizes.  When we are in the car, I can only drive about 20-25mph because the bumps hurt him so badly.  

I told him I wish I could take all his pain and I would have it so he didn't.  And his response was "Mom, I don't want you to have this, it hurts so much and you have had enough pain". I just about cried!

He was so happy that his dad Jeremy was able to get off of work and be able to come to Cumberland to come with us to the ultrasound and see the Dr for the confirmation of the hernia.  And he got to come back to lab to be with him when he got his blood drawn too.  We have the best co-parenting relationship and I'm so thankful for that!  Especially when things like this happen and we are both there for Jack and communicate with no tension whatsoever.  If I had to give ANY advise to parents with kids getting a divorce or just not being together, whatever your feelings about each other are PUT THAT ASIDE!!!! KIDS COME FIRST AND LEARN HOW TO CO-PARENT!!!!  Ok, that rant is over lol.

So, the referrals are sent to MHeath Fairview Children's Pediatric Surgery Department, so now we wait.  And hope they get him in soon.  We go back in tomorrow morning for repeat labs to see if his infection level is continuing to go up.  

I'm scheduled to go see the GI specialist and see Dr. Gray on Thursday both in the cities.  I really want to get to these appointments, but I also really want to stay with Jackson.  It so hard being a single mom with a sick child who is in a lot of pain.  I'm so incredibly grateful I have a job that is so understanding as well.  

I have showed Jack some of the Facebook comments people have written on the first post I had made and he literally cried happy tears, and I asked why he was crying, he said "Mom, because it is so nice that so many people care about me" 😭😭😭

This boy is such a a kind-hearted, sensitive little (well big) guy.  He wears his heart on his sleeve.  I truly just want him to feel no more pain and go back to doing the things he loves like playing sports!  I mean, he's not even hardly eating.  If you know Jack, auntie Jen even made him spaghetti and he wouldn't even eat any of it.  None!  That is NOT like him.  She also made him pancakes and he only ate one!  (That was a different day). He special requested a couple slices of pepperoni pizza at Kwik Trip (thank you M&M) today after his ultrasound that his dad bought him and when we got home he said I'm sorry Mom, I just can't eat any 😭.  This isn't my boy.  

If you have that parenting instinct, follow it.  Co-parent rather than fight, and be kind to everyone ❣️